sacrifice
by DarkShadowFlame
Summary: They all know the price of war, too well. Harry has said goodbye to friends and mentors... Ron gave his life. But Hermione has so much more to lose than either of them, and the time has come to put it all on the line…


sacrifice: they know the meaning of the word all too well

* * *

The door was ajar, so Hermione just walked into Ron's room, letting the door swing closed behind her. He was lying on his bed, hand thrown dramatically over his eyes, and she perched on the edge of his bed. "I wish Fleur and Mum had never settled their differences," Ron declared. "Together they're so much worse than either one alone!"

"Your beloved Fleur?" Hermione asked archly.

Ron grinned sheepishly. "She's marrying my brother and she's allied with my Mum!" he said in explanation, but after a pause, added "Besides… I think I fancy someone else."

Hermione's entire face went red and, before she could embarrass herself in any capacity, she plunged into the point of her visit. "I want to tell you something, Ron. Rather, show you something."

"Sure," he said, propping himself up in bed and looking at her intently. Hermione permitted herself a moment to enjoy the attention and consideration he was paying her before standing up and pulling her wand out. She pointed it at the door and whispered a locking spell. Ron raised his eyebrows as the door squelched shut around the edges. Hermione looked back at the slight grin on his face and shook her head, putting her hands on her hips. "Oh, honestly, are all boys the same? It's not what you think. I just don't want anyone walking in on us."

"Sure you don't," he repeated, still grinning widely.

"Stop," she huffed. "Listen, this is important! I haven't shown anyone this yet, except of course for Professor McGonagall, and… well, I wanted you to be the first," she trailed off quietly. Hermione saw the expression on Ron's face change when she said 'McGonagall', and she saw that he was holding in a snigger. Rolling her eyes, she marched to the center of the room – and turned into a lion.

_"Merlin's bloody beard!"_ Ron howled, leaping up on the bed and banging his head on the low ceiling. He fell back on the bed, swearing loudly, and a somewhat chagrined Hermione transformed back and rushed over to him.

"Oh, it's not that bad," she said crossly, annoyed that he wasn't more focused on her accomplishment. "Stop carrying on so, your mother will hear."

"She won't," Ron corrected, still clutching his head. "I got Bill to soundproof the walls ages ago. But Hermione! Could we focus on what's important here! Did you just turn into a bloody _cat_?"

"A mountain lion," Hermione automatically corrected, but any displeasure with him was quickly fading. He was gazing up at her with a look of awe on his face.

"Can you do it again?" Ron asked, struggling to sit up again. He took his hands away from his head and stared at her in wonder. Hermione gave him a soft smile, and obligingly took on the mountain lion form again. Ron tentatively ran his hands over her fur, breathing "Bloody hell. This is amazing. Amazing…"

Uncomfortable with how good his touch made her feel, Hermione backed up and resumed her human shape. Ron just watched her for a long time, before finally breaking the silence: "You're an Animagus? When did this happen?"

She looked away, twisting her fingers. "Well… I got the idea at the end of fifth year," she admitted softly. "After… you know. The Veil." Hermione took a shaky breath, holding in her tears. "I was inspired by Padfoot." Her voice broke slightly on his name. "I did the preliminary research that summer and Professor McGonagall coached me last year. I finally managed it but then… well, that was when things got really bad."

Neither of them particularly wanted to remember the events of last spring, so they fell silent again. And again, Ron broke it. "You amaze me, Hermione," he said gently. "I mean, in your third year, you had the time-turner, and then your whole spew program-" Hermione was so touched, she couldn't even correct the title for him- "and now learning to be an Animagus, just you and McGonagall, in one year? You never take a break, but you… you're so…"

Hermione chanced a peek at him; Ron's face was fire-engine red, and he was searching for words, a determined look on his face. "You're so… well, amazing," he repeated with a wry smile. "And I love you," he added, almost under his breath.

Speechless, Hermione stood still and stared at him for a long time. When he looked back, confident in his declaration and only waiting for her response, she felt tears spring to her eyes. Wordlessly, she moved into his arms. Somehow, in between kissing and panting and touching and that pure, sweet bliss, she managed to whisper back, "I love you too."

* * *

Hermione woke up slowly, fluttering her eyelashes open and staring at the ceiling. After a few moments, she rolled soundlessly out of bed, glancing at Ginny asleep in the bed next to hers. She exited their bedroom, closing the door gently behind her and padded down the halls of Grimmauld Palace and into the bathroom. As she took a quick shower to wake herself up, she reminisced on that night she and Ron spent together. It was just that one night, and she never expected things to go so far; but she had never regretted it, or the consequences. Especially considering… suppressing a shudder, Hermione pushed the thought away, letting cool water run down her shoulders.

It was still quite early when she went downstairs, but Harry was already awake, eating a cold breakfast alone. "Hey," she greeted softly.

"Morning, Hermione," Harry mumbled into his plate. "How did you sleep?"

"Surprisingly well," she said lightly, fixing herself some toast and jam.

Harry looked up at her, and she felt a pang as she took in the pallor of his face and the dark circles under his eyes. "Did you dream of him?" Harry asked quietly.

Hermione nodded, sitting next to him. "But in a good way."

Harry managed a smile. Hermione, observing him, asked gently, "Did you?"

He nodded tiredly. "Not in such a good way."

Hermione knew that Harry didn't mean to bring up that memory again, but she knew exactly what he had been dreaming about, and her mind flew immediately to that night:

* * *

"We did it," Harry said, finally allowing his wand arm to drop and turning to give his friends an exhausted grin. "The fifth Horcrux." Hermione was half-crying with relief that they had survived the preceding traps, but returned his grin. Harry turned back around and reached out for Gryffindor's amulet, but was stopped mid-reach by Ron's hand grabbing his arm.

"Hey, mate," Ron said, "Better let me do that. Just in case it's bewitched or something."

"Oh!" Hermione said, flustered that she hadn't thought of that. "Let me just run a few diagnostic tests on it."

Both boys stood back while she performed some quick spell-work. "Well, there doesn't seem to be anything wrong with it," she said uncertainly. "But I wouldn't really know what spells to check for. Voldemort uses a lot of spells I've never even heard of."

"I'm sure there's nothing wrong with it," Harry started to say, but Ron interrupted him again.

"All the more reason to let me get it," he said, looking at Hermione. "Just in case," he repeated. Ron reached out to grab it, and the thought that constantly haunted Hermione was that neither of them had stopped him, neither of them had taken the threat seriously enough, neither of them had thought of using the right diagnostic spell, neither of them had done anything…

Ron's fist erupted in flames. He howled, and dropped the amulet, but the fire didn't go out; it spread quickly up his arm and across his body. Hermione screamed, and Harry jumped, and they both immediately started shooting spells and anti-jinxes and counter-curses at him, but nothing worked. Desperately, Hermione lunged at Ron, intending to smother the fire. But he saw, somehow, through the flames; the last action Ronald Weasley ever performed was to cast _Petrificus__ Totalus_ on Hermione Granger to keep her away from the deadly fire.

Hermione remembered tipping over, helpless, staring at the ceiling, listening to Ron's screams go on and on and Harry's shouting and crying… until, the worst of all, the silence came, and she Knew.

The _Petrificus__ Totalus_ abruptly released her, and Hermione's eyes were free to run with tears again. Her entire body wracking with sobs, she crawled over to Harry, clutching onto his arm. Their eyes met, and though they tried not to look, they both looked over. All that was left of Ron Weasley was a heap of ashes… and Gryffindor's amulet lay shattered in pieces around it.

"The amulet," Hermione choked, gagging on the thick stench of burning flesh and hair and her own saltwater tears dripping into the corner of her mouth. "It's broken."

"Sacrifice," Harry whispered hoarsely. "Riddle never did understand how powerful it can be."

Harry and Hermione struggled to their feet and staggered out of the tunnel, clutching onto each other for dear life, breathing heavily. Hermione's tears did not abate for a long time, and the thought kept running through her head, _I__ never told him…_

* * *

Harry flicked his wand and his plate went flying into the sink, the uneaten half of his breakfast into the garbage. "Ready?" Hermione asked, standing up.

"Yeah." He stood as well, cramming his wand and his hands into his pocket. They began walking towards the hallway, and Harry was poised in the entranceway when an angry voice asked, "Were you planning to say goodbye?"

Hermione turned around to see Ginny, still in her pajamas, standing at the opposite end of the kitchen, arms crossed and eyes blazing. Hermione quietly backed into a corner, knowing the question wasn't addressed to her.

Harry paused for a long while before slowly turning around. Ginny watched him, her mouth quivering. Hermione realized that Ginny's eyes weren't merely bright with anger, they were shimmering with unshed tears. Ginny brushed at them angrily, clearly upset with herself. As Harry opened his mouth to speak, she beat him to it. "I'm sorry," she said, her voice wavering a little. "I shouldn't have – I didn't mean to –"

"Ginny, I do still love you."

Both Ginny and Hermione froze at Harry's sudden, soft-spoken declaration. Hermione glanced down, her own tears filling her eyes, pushing away her own regret and focusing on being happy for her friends.

Ginny bit her lip furiously, searching for the right words, and eventually settling for a quiet "I still love you too. I never stopped." She and Harry locked gazes for a long, long time before Harry turned back around to the hallway. "Will you at least tell me where you're going?" Ginny added desperately. "Just… in case?"

Struck by the words, Hermione and Harry both shuddered a little. Both the phrase and the girl must have moved Harry, because he turned back and responded evenly, "To the Riddle mansion."

Ginny gasped. "_Why?_"

"There's only one more Horcrux," Harry said grimly. "Nagini, Riddle's snake. Professor Lupin and the others reported that Riddle is in Spain right now, starting up an insurgency there. Now's the time to go in; it's as empty as we'll ever get it."

Ginny hesitated: "Harry…" Then, as if knowing it was the best thing she could do for him, she spun around and left the room. Harry sighed, a deep exhalation of breath, and allowed himself a moment of luxury to simply stand there with his head bowed. Then he straightened his spine and marched out of Grimmauld Palace.

* * *

Hermione jerked her head towards the next door. Nodding, Harry moved silently across the floor and edged it open. He recognized the scene instantly from his vision years ago: this was the room where Voldemort and Wormtail had consorted, murdered the Muggle Frank Bryce and plotted Barty Crouch Jr.'s infiltration of Hogwarts. He gestured at Hermione: this was where they had expected to find Nagini. Hoping the snake was somewhere in the vicinity, Hermione had just started across the room when the door they had just entered through flew open again and hit the wall with a bang.

Hermione's reaction time was quick, but Bellatrix Lestrange had gotten the advantage, and she was quickly joined by half a dozen other Death Eaters. Hermione could see out of the corner of her eye and hear Harry fighting back. "_Expelliarmus_!" Hermione hissed, aiming it at the nearest Death Eaters. Even as two of their wands flew away from them, she saw a jet light rapidly approaching her, and her "_Protego__"_ was only partly up when it hit. Knocked back to the floor, Hermione felt her wand being pulled physically from her hand. She looked up to see the unwelcome sight of Bellatrix leering down at her.

"_Crucio_," someone called, and Hermione flinched, but the spell wasn't directed at her. She craned her neck to see Harry, wandless, shaking in pain, but his mouth was kept determinedly shut.

The Death Eater, nervous at Harry's remarkable silence, lifted the spell. Hermione was hauled to her feet, across the room from Harry, and both of them were guarded by several Death Eaters keeping their wands pointed at their heads.

The Black sisters stood in the center of the room, the clear leaders of this gang. Narcissa's face was impassive, but Bellatrix's was alight with a mad fire. "Potter… Granger," she crooned. "Oh, and where's little Ronald Weasley?" She cackled madly as Hermione's entire body went rigid. Ron's death had been widely publicized and it wasn't possible that Bellatrix didn't know about it. She was taunting them.

"What did you come here for?" Narcissa asked suddenly, cutting to the chase, pointing her wand at Harry's heart. Bellatrix's laughter died away and she raised her own wand.

"He won't answer that," she said, locking eyes with Harry. "Maybe a little Cruciatus curse will loosen that tongue." Hermione bit her lip desperately as Bellatrix screamed, "_Crucio__!"_

Harry's head bowed down and his entire body wracked in agony. But he remained upright, his mouth sealed closed, not a sound of pain emanating from his lips. "_Crucio__ Crucio!"_ Bellatrix screamed again, but Harry did not budge. His lips moved once, soundlessly, and Hermione thought he was whispering "Dumbledore's man." Finally, Bellatrix lowered her wand, and Hermione noticed that her arm was shaking slightly.

A murmur swept through the room as the Death Eaters looked at Harry in a new light. Most of them were visibly shaken.

"Shut up," Bellatrix snarled, whirling around and fixing her wand on Hermione. "Talk, Potter, or I'll kill her."

An abrupt hush fell over them all. Hermione looked at Harry, her eyes wide. A sudden protective instinct, stronger than anything she had ever felt, swept over her body. She had to live! Not for herself – but for others.

Harry opened his mouth, but Hermione cut him off. "Please don't kill me. I'm pregnant," she said calmly.

If she thought it had been quiet before, it was nothing compared to now. She risked a glance at the Death Eaters surrounding them: identical expressions of shock and uncertainty. Bellatrix stared at her, and Narcissa's mouth was hanging open. Harry's face had gone whiter than under the Cruciatus curse and he was looking at Hermione like it was the first time he'd ever seen her. She thought she saw a flicker of hope in his eyes: he clearly realized it was Ron's, and maybe his best friend wasn't entirely gone from this earth after all. There was a legacy.

Bellatrix recovered first, and raised her wand again, but Narcissa smacked her sister's arm down. "Didn't you hear her? She's _pregnant_," Narcissa hissed. "Do what you like to Potter, but I won't let you hurt that child!"

"It's not a child yet," Bellatrix snarled back. "And what if she's lying?"

"That's easy enough to check." Narcissa pointed her wand at Hermione's stomach and muttered a few words. Recognizing the incantation, Hermione lifted her shirt slightly, exposing her bare stomach. Two balls of blue, no larger than tennis balls, glowed faintly from under her flesh.

"She _is_ pregnant," Narcissa breathed. "And with twins."

Narcissa seemed to have forgotten where and who she was. She stared at Hermione's stomach, a look of complete motherly devotion taking over her face. When she finally looked up, she and Hermione locked eyes, and Hermione saw understanding. After all, Narcissa was a mother too, and not even Death Eaters were entirely black and white.

"You can't hurt her," Narcissa repeated, stepping in between Hermione and Bellatrix. "Not while she is carrying those children."

"You are weak," Bellatrix hissed at her sister. "But it doesn't matter," she said, more loudly, stepping away from Narcissa into the center of the room. "The Dark Lord will be here soon, and he will get the truth from Potter! He might even kill Granger," she added with a sneer. When Hermione and Harry jerked in surprise, she smiled cruelly. "Oh, yes, he'll be here presently. You expected him to be in Spain, didn't you? Well, luckily for you, he cut his visit short."

"I hope that means things went badly down there," Harry said defiantly. Bellatrix bared her teeth at him, but by her silence, Hermione knew it was true. At least there were some small blessings… even if Harry was about to die. Hermione closed her eyes. He was absolutely defenseless: Voldemort would take him down easily, with one quick spell. She only hoped that Professor Lupin and Professor McGonagall and the Order would be able to pick up where they had left off. It was just the snake, really, and then a clear path to Voldemort…

When she first heard the soft slither of scales on a stone floor, Hermione attributed it to her imagination and the fact that she had just been thinking about Nagini. But when she opened her eyes again, Hermione saw the serpent slide into the room. She didn't dare turn to look as Nagini passed her smugly and turned, curling up between her and Bellatrix. Her heart began beating wildly: the last Horcrux! So close! She forced herself not to stare at Nagini, or at Harry, and hoped he was doing the same. If Nagini was here, the final Horcrux dangling before their noses, it meant that Voldemort didn't realize yet what they had done. He didn't realize yet what grave danger he was in.

_But__ what can we do?_ she thought desperately. Without their wands, she and Harry were virtually helpless, waiting around for Voldemort to come in and proclaim their doom. And who knew how long, if ever, it would take the Order to get close to Nagini? Voldemort would not make the same mistake twice; he would never allow his mansion to be infiltrated again.

_It _can't_ end like this_, Hermione vowed. She had to do something. They could still get out of this, somehow, but _how?_ She could hardly lunge at Nagini with her bare hands, and Bellatrix would surely kill her if she moved.

_You're__ not unarmed_, a little voice inside her whispered. _BRING OUT THE LION. They aren't expecting it. Professor McGonagall taught you to become an Animagus: USE IT. You can get Nagini. You can destroy the Horcrux._

She wanted to break down and cry, to protest. She _couldn't_ use her Animagus form. She just _couldn't_. To do that, to transform, would be to…

Except that she _had_ to.

A wave of coldness washed through the room as the tall silhouette of Lord Voldemort appeared in the doorway. Bellatrix turned eagerly to greet her master, and Hermione seized on the moment. She thrust her thoughts inward, focusing on the powerful beast lying within her. Even as she felt her skin begin to shift, she pounced, landing on Nagini as the transformation completed. Her claws dug into the snake's exposed back, and Hermione clamped her jaws around the snake's skull, sinking her sharp teeth deeply in and feeling the bone splinter.

Shrieks of alarm went up around the room, and Lord Voldemort's howl of rage echoed above all others. Bellatrix whirled around, raising her wand swiftly at Hermione. But as she opened her mouth to form the deadly incantation, a door across the room banged open, and a jet of purple light blew the wand out of her hand, taking off half of her arm in the process.

Hermione looked through the cat's eyes to see the Order of the Phoenix charge into the room. Kingsley had just performed the spell that saved her, and he and the others quickly fanned out. Half a dozen people surrounded Harry, and he recovered his wand. Harry raised it, shouting a spell and joining the fray wholeheartedly. Hermione wanted to transform back, to stand and fight with them, but the weight of what she had done pressed down on her. Her eyes rolled to the back of her skull, and Hermione collapsed on top of Nagini's corpse.

* * *

Again, she woke slowly. Hermione half-hoped that she would open her eyes to find herself back in Grimmauld Palace, finding Ginny sleeping quietly next to her; or better yet, at home, in her own bed, before this awful war had started and all she had to think about was lovely summer reading. But even with her eyes shut, she could tell that she was in neither of those places. It was noisy, people bustling everywhere around her, and sounds of jubilation ringing throughout the room.

"When Professor Lupin came back and said that Voldemort had left Spain, I was afraid that he would find you two," Ginny was saying tearfully from somewhere to her left. "So I told him where you'd gone. Oh, Harry, you're not mad at me, are you?"

"Of course not," Harry responded, his voice hoarse but joyful. "The Order saved us. Hermione got the Horcrux, and with Professor Lupin's help, I got Voldemort."

Ginny gave a half-sob, half-laugh, and Hermione heard some shuffling. She rolled over and cracked her eyes to see Harry, sitting up in a hospital bed next to her, with Ginny perched next to him on top of the sheets, her arms wrapped around him. Harry squeezed her tightly, whispering again, "I love you."

Hermione rolled onto her back again, staring at the ceiling. She couldn't bring herself to feel any joy for her friends, or the end of the war; she couldn't bring herself to feel at all. Tears springing to her eyes, she struggled to sit up in bed. Was it her imagination, or was that blood pooling out from around her waist, staining the sterile white sheets of St. Mungo's hospital beds? That Healer with the solemn face walking away, what was in that metal tray, what was hidden under that black cloth? What was this terrible emptiness in her stomach?

"She's awake!" someone said, from far away. "Hermione, Hermione! You did it!"

She vaguely realized it was Professor Lupin, and _he didn't know_, he didn't know why her world was ending, he didn't know why she was bloody from the waist down, he didn't know she was a murderer…

She remembered the transformation again, the feeling of power; her nails narrowing into claws, hair sprouting out from her body, muscles growing, her spine shifting, tail uncurling…

And her stomach morphing, turning into a lion's belly, and the animal uterus that could not support human fetuses… tissue warping; blood changing; embryonic sac melting away, placenta useless, oxygen and nutrients gone; umbilical cord pulling away; fetuses choked, squashed, deprived, alone, _dead_…

Ron's children… Ron's twin sons… the only thing that was left of Ron in the whole wide world…

With a strength and fervor that she thought was long gone, Hermione Granger opened her mouth and screamed; with a life she never expected to have, with a passion she never expected to feel again, she was screaming. She was screaming, and nothing could console her, and through her anguish and pain she could see the horrified faces of everyone gathered around her bed, features distorted in sorrow and loss…

"_MY BABIES… MY BABIES… MY BABIES…"_


End file.
